LaKeith Stanfield opened up about his anxieties while filming The Harder They Fall with Idris Elba and Regina King. The actor posted a video to Instagram on Nov. 4 describing his experience.

Stanfield wrote a caption with his video and said he was not in a healthy mental space while filming the western. He would drink every night in an attempt to “laugh off” his pain.

“The wrost part of filming this movie was that I was in a pretty bad space mentally,” wrote Stanfield. “I couldn’t see what life had in store to teach me about myself that i needed to know. I loved the horses so much because of their silent strength and beautiful patience with my reluctant fear at having never rode a horse before.”

The Get Out actor explained that a horse he called “Magnolia” bucked him off one day. Stanfield said that was the moment he heard, “BE STRONG OR GET OFF.”

He took control of the reigns and began bonding with the horse. He became so close with the horse that it was hard to separate after filming. Stanfield plays outlaw Cherokee Bill, a member of the Rufus Buck Gang, in the film.

“Now all i had to do was learn to take control of my life in the same way,” he continued. “What better team to create such a profound memory with in J and the talented cast. There is a sadness in me if you look closely into the eyes of Cherokee. Everyday on set i was experiencing crippling anxiety and suffering silently inside. I would drink every night after work and try to laugh off my pain. The real Cherokee made me keep Fighting as i thought about how he had to fight to survive. How the youth in Chicago has to fight everyday to survive. Here’s to fighting through the trauma to get to myself. Here’s to almost 6 months sober. Here’s to the fact that the bigger the goal God has for them, the taller they stand and, The Harder They Fall. ❤️‍🔥.”

Stanfield also had anxiety while filming Judas and the Black Messiah and explained that the body might not realize one is acting. The actor noted that he had panic attacks during a scene where he was supposed to poison Daniel Kaluuya’s character. The scene didn’t make the final cut.

“Sometimes your body thinks that’s real,” said Stanfield. “With somebody like Daniel, who I just respect as a human and an artist, as Fred Hampton, it felt like I was actually poisoning Chairman Fred Hampton.”

The 30-year-old actor has been sober for six months and is starring in another film with Danny DeVito, Tiffany Haddish, and Owen Wilson called Haunted Mansion

. The film is about a mother and son who come across a mansion full of eccentrics.

Stanfield is also returning in the new season of Atlanta, and the actor posted the new trailer on Instagram on Nov. 1. The new season will premiere next year.

The Harder They Fall is currently in theaters and streaming on Netflix.